Propaganda

Well, I found this, and it's 2 hours long, but I ended up watching the whole thing. These guys make Michael Moore look like a conservative Republican-hugging cheerleader, but there are some very interesting points. Watch it if you want. If you believe it all, it's more terrifying than any zombie movie I've ever seen.

http://www.zeitgeistmovie.com/main.htm

Homeless in Hawaii

Of late, I've been seriously considering the possibility of living on the beach in Hawaii while working at an unpaid internship. I found these really cool hammocks that are actually tents which would protect me from above AND below, and they cost about $200. That's less than one month's rent. I could get a fishing rod, build a fire, and eat coconuts. A hunter/gatherer grocery list. There are mongooses....mongeese.....mongi...? that run wild on the island, perhaps they would be tasty to trap and eat. I would be able to camp across the street from the place I want to work, there are public beach showers, and a homeless license (wow....that looks really weird, by nothing else is recognized by my spell check) costs $1/year.
Tell me that tent doesn't look awesome, and you'd be a gol'durn liar.

Done with Miami

I think I'm done with Miami. It is hot, it is humid, it is expensive, and it is crowded. My lease is up in June, so maybe I'll come back north to the land of Reasonable Temperatures, work for a few months, and then move to Hawaii. Seriously. There is an internship there working with marine mammals, which, I've decided, are much cooler than fish. Sorry, but they are. I know a guy who used to work at the place, I have experience in the field, what I don't have is money to support myself through the course of a 4 month unpaid internship, so I'm going to have to make some, and that isn't really possible here in Miami saying as how 80% of my pay each month goes toward rent, 15% goes toward food, and 5% just disappears somehow into that bottomless pit that is called "life". I could be a live-in nanny in Nantucket. Nantucket Nanny. Hmmm...

in other news: Happy Mother's Day all you moms out there, especially mine. Thanks for everything, like paying for my gas, helping me find a couch, making me dinner every time I come home (as rare as it is), and especially for supporting me regardless of how bizarre my choices in life become, and THAT'S a pretty big accomplishment.

Founder's Day

The traditions we observe: a well-rehearsed dance
Wake up, get started, and put on your pants
Breakfast is done with companions so dear
And when all is prepared we raise up our beer

Drink up for the founder, drink deep and drink long
Drink up for Matt Vassar and join in my song.
The sun is rising; the day has begun
Drink up for the founder and join in the fun.

With no time to spare, for we’re already late
We make our way out to meet with our fate
What does this day hold for our veteran corps
We’ve met with it all and triumphed before

Drink up for the founder, drink deep and drink long
Drink up for Matt Vassar and join in my song
The sun is rising; the day has begun
Drink up for the founder; come play in the sun

The grass is so green and the beer truck is near
Founder’s Day comes but once every year
Class and work are both far away
Let them both go and enjoy this one day

Drink up for the founder, drink deep and drink long
Drink up for Matt Vassar and join in my song
The sun is setting, the day it is done
Drink up for the founder; the night has begun!

Traditions

Traditions are a strange and unusual beast. Take this very moment for example. It is not yet 10 in the morning, and I have consumed several celebratory beverages in honor of Founder's Day. Matthew Vassar, the founder of my Alma Matter, was born near this time, and every year, the first weekend in May, we honor his dedication to the education of young feminists in the mid/late 1800's by drinking a lot. To be fair, the man was a beer brewer, and if women's education hadn't succeeded, he was going to turn the whole college into a beer brewery, so this seems reasonable. So there is established college tradition. But each group of people have their own individual Founder's Day traditions. Take my group of friends (please!) for example: every year for quite some time we have concocted shirts of varying shades of hideously bright in order to be able to find each other despite the thick crowds that gather to honor the founder, and this year is no different. This year, we have a Spartan with a toothbrush (the theme is Candyland...BRUSH YOUR TEEEEEEEEETH!!) and a ridiculously cute molasses creature named Plumpy from the Candyland game. There was also a Limit sketch comedy show last night, and traditions were observed while watching this insanity. It's just strange how certain habits begin, and how they perpetuate themselves through social memes and through the actions of our friends. A quote that I enjoy in this situation is: "Without tradition, we'd be forced to rely on logic and free thought, and who wants that?" (Bear in mind, this was said in a facetious tone of text) and it was said by one of the world's great thinkers...ME! So, happy Founder's Day all you Vassar students/grads (many of whom I've just slept on the floor with), enjoy this cold, cloudy, slightly damp day as much as you can, and raise a glass of beer and sign a song in honor of our good old founder, Matthew Vassar. Happy birthday Matt.

See you on the other side,
Justin

Kidney punched by a planet

Well, Saturdays are usually one of my easy days to get to work. The rest of the world is sleeping in while I am up and about at my usual time. I get to work, and get on with my day. Today, however, things did not go as planned. About 3 miles from work, I ran into traffic. And it didn't stop. I took over an hour to go 2 of the last 3 miles, and then took about 5 minutes to go the last mile because I parked my car at the beach parking lot, and got out and ran to work so I could get there before lunch.

After an eventful morning of scrubbing, I was getting out of one pool and preparing to sit on the ledge and rest for a moment, however, gravity had different plans for me: I missed my target by about 2 inches and fell flat on my back with my weight belt still around my waist. One of the 4lb lead weights was smacked into my left kidney, essentially making the planet Earth kidney punch me. It was hilarious at the time, and my scrubbing partner and I almost killed ourselves laughing, and then I tried to sit up, and realized how painful the rest of my day was going to be because I could no longer bend over to pick things up. WHOOPIE! Oh, and I had to go fill 15 air tanks about an hour later.

World 1, Justin 0
Have to do better tomorrow.

Founder's Day

It has been much on my mind that we don't have shirts for Founder's Day: 2008, and this would be a tragedy to rival the cancellation of The Adventures of Brisco County, Jr. We must rally the troops and get a shirt design together, PRONTO. My contribution at the moment is the scary children from this picture. Boys for the guys, girls for the ladies.
Please disregard the creepy picture of R. Kelly in the background, he is irrelevant and this is the only picture of the Candyland Kids I could find. Please input ideas so that this does not become the plan.