Getting a jump on New Years

My resolution for this new year is to maintain better contact with my friends who I see all-too-seldom. Since I'm spending between 3 an 6 hours driving to/from school/work alone every week and sometimes get sleepy in the car, I'm going to start calling you folk and talking to you, particularly when it falls under my "nights and weekends" portion of my phone plan. And I'm starting now, since New Year's Day is still a month away.

Headlines

It snowed here yesterday. 1/2 inch of accumulation. School was canceled today because of it.

I have a new bed frame. My queen sized luxury mattress and box springs no longer need to rest ingloriously upon the floor. It is made from black walnut and has 4 drawers. (The bed frame, not the floor)

My puppy is a year old

In two days, I will have been working at the same job, living in roughly the same place, for 2 continuous years.

In October, Olivia and I had been dating a year. Now it is more than that. Quick calculation informs me that it is currently something like 14 months.

My camera has been sent to the Best Buy Geek Squad to fix a (hopefully) minor problem with the viewfinder. I have a protection plan, so theoretically it won't cost me anything.

I miss my friends, and wish them the Merriest of Christmases, the Happiest of CKHannakahs, and the Most Joyous of Festivuses in the coming month.

Now where's my dad-gum figgy pudding?

SCUBA 2.0

Well, this weekend, I upgraded my SCUBA certification. I am now a PADI Advanced Open Water Diver. I am certified to dive up to 130' deep (I've been 110 as of yesterday) and I can theoretically navigate in low visibility water armed only with a compass and the knowledge that 27 of my kicks is approximately equal to 100 feet of travel. It also turns out that doing 5 dives in one day is extremely tiring. Also, if I have not had time to brag to you, I just purchased a pair of Powerisers, and they are believed to be arriving on August 31st. Pictures, I'm sure, will follow, and perhaps even broken bones (although hopefully not..). There have been slip n' slides (homemade) and trips to North Carolina (camping on the beach was involved) in the past month, none of which were written about until this time, and I hope you, faithful reader, were not off-put by my lack of correspondence. Until next time, hang in there.

Tanning salon

Today, I spent nearly an hour in what I choose to describe as "a tanning salon catering exclusively to acrobatic contortionists". I spent the time between 7:30am and 8:30am, indoors, wearing gloves, sunglasses, balanced on a very precariously balanced ladder, in a narrow space, sweating profusely. In actuality, what I was doing was changing the

14

four foot long fluorescent light bulbs on one of my exhibits, when the lights just happen to be situated in a 10 foot deep pit, where the only access is by a ladder that is 5 feet tall, lays on the bottom, and is only reachable by a grappling hook that I jury-rigged with rebar, a carabeaner, and some climbing rope. It was actually kind of fun in that "yeah, it's annoying, but this place is kinda cool" sort of way.

We also caught two sharks today. We were only going to catch one, but we got the wrong one first, and had to try again. It was a long day, but at the end I got to go see Avenue Q with Olivia, Kevin, and Christy. The show is well worth going to. It's hilarious, and I'll probably be humming "Schadenfreude" well into Thursday.

Anyway, goodnight from Tennessee. I'll probably be seeing some of you soon at Father's Day in Pennsylvania.

Home again, home again

Jiggity jig.

I'm back in Tennessee. Pictures to follow once I get a card reader to replace the card reader that I got to replace the USB cord that came with my camera that I lost at around this time last year. Go me.

Wildfire

I, like the dentist caught in an avalanche of dentures, and in Massachusetts. I arrived yesterday shortly after noon, and am spending the majority of this week imposing on the goodwill of college friends while we all attend Spring Wildfire 2010. Last year, this is where I learned to breathe fire and a few new contact staff tricks. The goal this year is to learn some poi tricks and some double staff moves, also not to drown due to the predicted constant rain that will joining us from Friday until Sunday. Pictures will surely follow after I get back to Tennessee.

Pictures that make me laugh

See if you can spot the thing that made me laugh in this one.


Miranda brought her puppy Mari to come play with Puck. Mari will be staying with us next week while Miranda and Josh attend a wedding in Wisconsin, so we thought it best that the puppies know each other before being forced to spend a week in close proximity. They got along like a house on fire. I think this picture makes it look like Puck is flying.

Circus and fencing with sharks

This Tuesday at work, I got to fence with sharks. Basically, I was handed a 3 foot long piece of 1.5" PVC pipe with some electric tape wrapped around it, and told "Don't let the sharks eat Jeff". Now, these are 8 foot long, 300-400lb Sand Tiger Sharks. They have considerably more mass and much more impressive dentition than your average Ivy League fencer, on the other hand, they are less likely to bite you than your typical saberist. Well, to cut the story short, Jeff is still alive, and more-or-less a whole man (the missing parts aren't my fault).

The next day I got to go to the Ringling Brothers & Barnum & Baily Circus in Knoxville. Olivia surprised me a couple days before and informed me that we would be attending, so despite an oncoming illness, I went and had a lot of fun. It was full of Cuban acrobats, Asian elephants, miniature ponies, some trained house cats, 6 lionesses, and an exuberant golden retriever. There may be pictures to follow. Mine aren't that great, but Olivia had her zoom lens and was able to get some better ones than I was.

Lord, what fools these mortals be!

Well, I've done it again. Not learning my lesson from the incident in Miami, I went and got another dog. This one is a border collie/blue heeler mutt who was picked up free from a run down trailer in Union County, Tennessee. On the other hand, I do live in a bigger house, with an actual yard, and a job that allows me to EARN money rather than slowing the rate at which I lose it. After nearly a day and a half of trying names on for size, he has been harnessed with the moniker "Puck". (He was nearly stuck with Othello, because he's black, but the desire to name him after a troublemaker in a comedy rather than the main character of a tragedy won out.) Here, for your viewing pleasure, is my friend Puck

String is fun.
Playing is hard work

In other news, the Knoxville News Sentinel (newspaper in Knoxville...go figure) ran a segment about our aquarium. To do this, they came and followed the late night aquarist around for 3 hours, making it nearly impossible to do any work and asking lots of questions. How do I know what they did? I was that aquarist. Here is the 5 minute video supplement that was also run with the print version.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XgvQA48tiqI

That ought to satisfy my parents for my goings on for the past few days. Have a good weekend Mom and Dad, you'll probably have to watch that video at the library or school.

How I spent my New Year's Eve

In a fit of artistic...genius? genocide? Olivia and I drew pictures for the other to color. Here are the results. I'll leave you to guess which was drawn by whom.

Orly?

Merry Christmas and Happy Jewsmas to all of you out there.

One year and disjointed other happenings.

I've been here one year as of Tuesday, I've been working at the same place as of Thursday. That's the longest time I've been anywhere since I graduated (longer if you count moving betwixt dorm rooms/buildings as "not the same place"). I start getting paid more next week (good thing it's the start of a new pay period) and I couldn't be happier about that. Hurray for $5000 raise! I'm trying to adopt a dog, specifically a border collie, from an animal shelter around here but I haven't heard back from the adoption agency yet, I'm going to play D&D tomorrow... It's like I've established a routine or something. I didn't win anything at the Christmas party this year (same as last year), I spent about 4 hours underwater this week, and my car is slowly (and sometimes not so) falling apart. I learned the scale for bagpipe last week and will hopefully be starting lessons this week. It snowed ~1.5 inches last Saturday and has been alternately warm and freezing this week.

That's all I can think of right now for this episode of "What has been happening with Justin's life". Well, all that I can think of that's fit to share on the internet anyway...

Sometimes you seize the day...

Other times the day seizes you.

Picture this:
There is a large man with a beer gut, a total of three teeth and 11 toes. He stands about 6'6" and weighs a meager 375lbs and his name is Leroy. Leroy has been in prison for the past 10 years and he's startin' to get REEEEEAAAAAL lonely and he thinks you've got a purdy mouth.

Actually, let me take that back. That analogy would imply that I had one big problem, which is patently untrue. Today was more along the lines of this:

You're Joe Pesci trying to break into the McAllister's house while they are on Christmas vacation, but this little twerp has been plunking away at you with his BB gun all evening, and you'd wring the little bastard's neck if you could just get ahold of him, but unfortunately he's turned the entire sidewalk to ice which results in you losing your footing and landing squarely on your ass. Once you finally regain your feet and trap the little twerp in his tree house, as you climb up to administer the coups dé grace, just as you grab the top rung, you realize that it's been cut 3/4 of the way thru and you plummet 10 feet back to the earth. That's what kind of day it's been. Lots of little Kevin McAllister events that add up to one gigantic Leroy of a day.

Birthday

I had a birthday, ymmmmhmmm. There was dinner, a circus, coworkers and friends, and Olivia. It was a pretty good time all in all. However, it's become strange to me; I've had my 26th birthday in Tennessee, 25th in Hawaii, 24th in Florida, 23rd in Pennsylvania, 22nd, 21st, 20th, and 19th in New York, and all the preceding ones in West Virginia. I've become accustomed to moving so frequently that nowhere really feels like "home" any more. I think I've mentioned this to some of you faithful readers before, and it still distresses me. I've lived in Tennessee for nearly a year (Dec. 8th it will be) and I'm still not convinced it's home. There's a line in Garden State:

"It's like you feel homesick for a place that doesn't even exist. Maybe it's like this rite of passage, you know. You won't ever have this feeling again until you create a new idea of home for yourself, you know, for your kids, for the family you start, it's like a cycle or something. I don't know, but I miss the idea of it, you know."

I'm not sure if that's exactly how I feel, but it's pretty close. I'm proud to say that I have friends all over the country, friends that I could count on, but where do I get to stop and have a home again?

More of the same

Pictures of what I've been doing, and nonsense like that.

This Friday we had an aquarist bonfire at our house. Kevin tried to light a giant pile of freshly-cut grass from the yard in order to start said fire, but only ended up generating a lot of smoke and an unpleasant odor. After the addition of nearly half a gallon of lighter fluid, the grass was reluctantly forced to a sullen smolder, but the wood caught fire. Chili was eaten, hot cider and cold beer were drank, and a commotion was raised. Just a small commotion, probably not much more than a toddler, but raised nonetheless.


The next day Olivia and I went to Cade's Cove so that she could get pictures with a gigantic "view camera" that Olde Timey contraption you see in so many Back to the Future scenes. It was rather chilly early in the morning, with frost and all that nonsense, but by late afternoon I was able to fall asleep in a field in shorts and a tshirt while she lugged around that giant contraption on a tripod.


I had a fried apple pie, some jalepeño and peppermint flavored fudge (actually really good), and a pretty good time.

This was just a picture I took while we were out that I liked.

I kicked a puppy

I went running yesterday morning, and on my 3 mile loop, two ladies were walking their dogs. One of these dogs, a small-ish (20-30lb) terrier-looking fellow, decided I was hostile and threatening in my activities, and so proceeded to chase me down the road. He got about 3 feet from me, barking, growling, and generally acting threatening, so I turned around and kicked him in the teeth without stopping. Needless to say, his mistress was less than pleased with me and proceeded to yell such admonishments as "He wann't gonna hurt you none!" and "If I thought he was gon' bite you, I wouldna let him go!"

Regardless of these well researched facts, I felt well justified in defending the integrity of my calf from this excessively aggressive little animal.

Things of no importance to anyone else.

Today was a good day. I mean, it was on par with saving a bus load of children from careening off a cliff at high speeds using nothing but rocket-propelled roller skates, a pneumatic grappling hook, and sheer manly courage. It was that good. I made pizza. A very thick, double deck pizza. There were too many toppings, and they simply could not be allowed to go to waste, so after assessing the situation, I decided that another layer of peppers, sausage, onion, mushroom, and pineapple could be added. When looking at that, it was determined that they would fall off unless they were held in place by another layer of cheese, so that simply had to be put on as well.

After the pizza there were cookies. So many cookies I cannot express. Chocolate cookies with mint chips and walnuts, and chocolate chip cookies with walnuts, and some with a little bit of both swirled in. I ended up eating so much that I had to be dragged across the floor, out of the kitchen, and then slowly work my way up onto the couch. There may or may not have been a brief food coma.

And I got to do all this with this strange, warped, smart, very cute girl that likes to be around me. She was even the one who dragged my fat ass out of the kitchen to the couch. By the way, if you're curious and I haven't already told you, her name is Olivia.

County fair: Lancashire, England 1987

Raucous children ran about underfoot, and the smell of fried foods floated heavily on the air. The jeering taunts of the clown at the dunk tank cut through the noise and the smells like a siren: a wheedling, irritating, obnoxious siren. A sign painted in garish turquoise and magenta hung next to the tank, with the words "Dunk him and WIN!" emblazoned boldly across it in large print.
"Come on up, slugger! Have a go!"
"Hey stretch, if your ears get any bigger, you're going to blow away!"
"Muscleman! Hey, Muscleman! show that pretty lady what you're made of!"
One by one, the marks on the midway stepped up to hurl that tiny white sphere at the even tinier target of red and white in hopes of sending the abrasive fellow into the ice cold water that waited below his precarious perch.
A slender young man with barely a wisp of a beard stepped up to the table and handed the man behind the sign a wrinkled and damp one pound note, and received three small balls in return.

"Ooooh! Look out ladies and gentlemen, we got Goliath in the house this evening!"
Without responding, the young lad rolled the ball back and forth in his hand for a second, and then, without a warning or windup, he whipped it toward the far end of the range, where it rang soundly as it smacked into the minuscule target, snapping it back and sending the clown plunging into the chilled tank.
After the splashing and applause stopped, the clown climbed back out of the tank, reset the mechanism, and climbed back onto his perch.
"Lucky shot! Lucky shot! I hear lightning never strikes twice in the same spot. Let's see what you've got there, Zeus!"
Whiz! Clang! Sploosh!
The clown went swimming a second time as more cheering and laughter erupted from the onlookers.

The mechanism was reset, the ball thrown again, and for a third time, the icy water doused the red wig perched atop that heavily made-up face as the ringing sound of leather on metal echoed across the field.
The man behind the table leaned toward the rack of prizes and began to pull one of the smallest stuffed animals from the bottom shelf, but the boy shook his head, reached into his pocket, and pulled out another badly beaten one pound note and handed it to the sweaty faced vendor. He took the three balls, and one by one, used them to send the now soaked clown plunging into the water again, and again, and again.

Again, he shook his head after being offered his choice of prizes off the middle shelf, handed in another pound, accepted the three balls in return, and thrice more sent them hurtling accurately toward the target eliciting three more angry splashes from the man on the mechanism, who now had thick white make up and bright red lipstick running down his face in rainbow-hued rivulets.

Again the choice of prizes was declined, despite the offer of those elusive treasures housed on the top shelf, seldom liberated by any hand.

Again, the exchange of money for three more white spheres, and again they flashed, straight and true to their target. Silence had fallen over the gathered spectators by this point, the clown had stopped his heckling and was struggling simply to stay afloat and breathe, while the man behind the table watched with a mixture of awe and anger. After the fifth encore performance, the ire of the man behind the counter was clearly roused, and he refused to sell the young man any more missiles. He simply waved his hand toward his wares and mumbled "Whatever you want..."
The slender young man looked for a second, and carefully pointed at the old balding man's beautiful young daughter. "Her." was all anyone heard him say. The old man didn't even lift a hand to stop her as she walked toward her champion, took hold of his hand, walked past her father, past the sodden clown, past the stunned and silend onlookers, and out of the fairgrounds. They were never seen again.

What has Justin been up to?

Well, I'm glad you asked. Even if you didn't, the fact that you're reading this indicates that you're curious anyway. I started drawing again...kind of. At least, I've done one drawing, the first one in a very long time.

It's called "Poi at rest" if you like those boring names that describe what is in the picture. If, like me, you find those names pedestrian and prosaic, it's called "Excuse me, but your goat is in my petunias". It was drawn in honor of the Fall Wildfire going on this weekend that I am currently missing.

Also, I've been doing some hiking, some of it with a young lady of questionable taste (she's going hiking in the woods with me after all), and recently we went up the Ramsay Cascade trail, a 4 mile trip that starts out as an easy jaunt up a mild incline, and then after a mile and a half, turns into a vertical death march up a narrow trail with boulders and roots everywhere.

(Headed up the trail)


(View of the stream below the falls)

We managed to make it up in 90 minutes, eat lunch at the top of the falls, and then it proceeded to rain. Steadily.

(View from the bottom of the falls)

The trip back down was much wetter and considerably faster, but there was a certain amount of intentional puddle splashing, tree shaking (I got hit in the head with a branch), and mud.

(View in the rain from a bridge over the stream)

In addition, since it is now October, and Halloween is rapidly approaching, I went all Jack(Skellington) O' Lantern-y.

(My pumpkin)

And to finish it off, here is a view across the valley from my back porch at the new house.

(A little dark, but the colors are better)

These pictures brought to you courtesy of the new SD card reader I bought to replace the USB cable for my camera that I lost. If you Boston guys happen to have noticed a Canon USB cable, it might be mine, it's been missing since Spring Wildfire.

Dammit...

Go ahead. Laugh at me. I'll still deny that I have a type, but lately I seem to have found myself going on several dates with a competitive tall blond girl.


I hate you all.